Unresolved Issues
22 January 2010
This year, I didn’t make any New Year resolutions. I’ve done it some years, and I find it’s mostly a case of setting yourself up for a fall. With an arbitrary start point (Jan 1) and an arbitrary deadline (Dec 31) there is pressure from beginning to end. But over the midwinter period I had a bit of a think about my priorities and I have some ambitions for the coming months:
Keep the wolf from the door. The CAB were completely useless and it turns out that after doing nothing they then closed our file without even bothering to mention it to us. No wonder my creditors think I’m ignoring them. As my brain is currently working a bit better than it was a year ago, I might have more luck in just negotiating for myself. Maybe.
Be more political. It’s about time I stopped being pissed off at the world and actually took some action, like I would have done years ago. Expect me to be writing more to my elected representatives, signing more petitions, publicising more. Maybe even organise a campaign or two of my own. Although if I’m honest that’s more likely to be next year. One step at a time.
Practise my writing skills. My written communication has always been a bit of a weak point. My standard of English is high, but it’s very unnatural for me to turn my thoughts into prose. Contrary to what most people seem to assume (including my parents, and every tutor I’ve ever had) I find it extremely hard work; it’s like there’s a hole where that bit of my brain should be, and I have to work around it. My inability to produce any volume of factual writing has led to serious problems at times in academic contexts, the worst case being my catastrophic failure to obtain my PGCE. I want at some point to try for a Masters degree, so I need to get past this. Writing more letters, and blogging, are two ways I’ll be trying to teach myself. If only it didn’t hurt so much…
Push through the pain. It’s not going to go away. And I’m blowed if I’m letting it ruin my life. So somehow this year I will find ways to get on with ordinary life stuff despite the hypermobility syndrome. It will probably mean auditing everything, from the equipment I use, to my daily routine. It’s already obvious that the MacBook keyboard is doing me no favours. *cry*
Think business. I’m not a capitalist. Obsession with money strikes me as something of a mental malfunction. Nevertheless, our life would be a lot easier if we had more of it, not least to pay off our debts. It would be nice if by the end of the year I had some sort of plan in place for making it happen. Or even part of a plan.
Because these aren’t “resolutions”, I’m not committed to achieving them. If I make some progress with each, that’ll be just great. Tragically, last year was the least productive year of my life, and now I’ll happily take any chance I can to say “I did that”.
